What's the Point?The point is to pick the most correct winners and end up with more points than everyone else. The more games you pick correctly, the more points you get. The more points you get, the more you can mock and shame those below you in the Ruckus standings. The Yahoo! site will show you how many points each game is worth, but I’m thinking is something in the following neighborhood: Round 1 | 1 point Round 2 | 2 points Round 3 | 4 points Round 4 | 8 points Round 5 | 16 points Championship | 32 points At then end of the tournament, whichever one of you end up with the most points will be deemed JD’s 15th Annual “Backed-up-paddy-wagon-mackin’-on-the-cats-ass-wake-up-late-honey-put-on-your-clothes-and-take-your-credit-card-to-the-liquor-store-maybe-you-shouldn't-have-such-hot-friends-I-got-rabbits-and-handkerchiefs-and-ladies-of-the-pole-drinking-Black-Label-but-there-ain't-no-mothafuckin'-dry-ice-Muhammed-is-the-most-commonly-used-name-on-Earth-read-a-fucking-book-for-once-over-the-counter-with-a-shotgun-I-can-see-Russia-from-my-house-get-the-fuck-up-out-that-740-shorty-I-ain't-playin'-she's-a-whole-lotta-woman-she's-a-whole-lotta-Rosie-kick-hot-shit-so-we-can-stack-the-Johnny-Cash-birthday-party-cheesecake-jellybean-boom-planet-rocker-show-stoppa-flow-proper-head-knocker-beat-styler-tail-dropper-do-my-thing-motherfucker-Phoebe-dear-i-think-Jacques-Costeau-is-dead-I'm-so-hungry-i-could-eat-the-ass-end-out-of-a-dead-rhino-hey-cherry-do-YOU-belong-to-the-physics-club-fuck-the-bullshit-it's-time-to-throw-down-and-then-my-penis-exploded-and-killed-everybody-bumpin'-an'-grindin'-like-a-slow-jam-freak-it-funk-it-backseat-trunk-it” Roundball Ruckus Grand Champion and come into sole possession 100% of the acquired donations. My experience with math and percentages, or lack thereof, has been well documented in years past. When I say “100%” of the donations – that’s not exactly how it works out, unfortunately. You’ll end up with 100% of the donations AFTER Ruckus HQ expenses like hosting fees, t-shirt screens, a poncho to wear so we don’t get wet when we’re hiding in the bushes outside Natalie Gulbis’ house and it starts raining. Please be assured that they are all important, business-related expenses. Once you get your donations do the right thing and report and/or pay your taxes. There. I said it. I’m out of the loop. I’m not prison material so if the IRS comes knocking at my door, you can bet your sweet ass that they’re showing up on your doorstep next. |
